Friday, May 9, 2008


Washington – AP (Ameliorated Panhandlers) President Bush is attacked by a sparrow for more:

The animal kingdom expressed their displeasure of President Bush today by pooping on him during a news conference. A lone sparrow, possibly sent by Al Queada, made a daring daylight attack on President Bush while the liberal media did nothing to prevent the attack.

Former Republican leader Tom Delay was overheard to say, "that wouldn't have happened if the Republicans ( CORRECTION Democrats - ed.) were in charge."

Neocon activists throughout the country have been everywhere online one upping each other on how they would have handled the situation. One poster on the website Iammoreneoconthanyou stated, "I would have jumped and taken the poop so the dear leader didn't have to brush it off." Some questioned where was Nancy Pelosi was, what did she know and when did she know it.

The sparrows have now been listed as a terrorist organization. (link)

The Evil Sparrow Hits Bush

Just in:

In addition, the sparrow was caught by the brave men of the security forces. Our insider said the bird is “no bird brain at all” when pressed for answers it reportedly replied “Coo! Coo!” AP defense analyst intimated that it might be a coded message and all transmission of it should be suppressed at the moment.

Ameliorated Panhandlers reporter --------- contributed to this report from --------

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